Have you guys seen the show Harlem on Amazon Prime, featuring the beautiful Meagan Good? I am absolutely obsessed! It’s about four friends that navigate their careers, personal life, love life, and their friendships. What I like about the show the most is that it depicts a healthy BLACK girl friendship, in all its beautiful moments and ugly ones as well. Which actually brings me to my topic for the day: REAL FRIENDS! HOW MANY OF US HAVE THEM?

So one of the characters Quin, from season two is going through a lot mentally. She suffered from depression, and for a while she kind of puts up of a facade and avoids her friends. I see a lot of myself in her whenever I am just mentally not able. Back in February I was down as my grandmothers death anniversary approached. And although I’m usually the fun, care free friend…. I became the quiet, reserved, pulled back girly. Barely sending out texts, not wanting to answer calls. However, I did not show depression in the capacity of Quinn, and since I am chill for the most part, if you don’t know me personally then I’d appear as tho nothing is wrong. With that being said, can you believe my friends actually checked in. It seems like something small, but in a world where we always appear strong, and show no sign of weakness I was just like damnnnn, my girls get it.

At 28, I can say that my group of friends now (small, but solid) are probably the best friends I have ever had. I am not one to lean on anyone, ask for favors, and I am hardly ever vulnerable. But my girls know me so well that during this time in February I have received so much genuine love, and care that I (actually) got emotional because it was warm, caring feeling. It was just like wow.. this is what sisterhood feels like.

So often black women are made out to be in competition or put to go against each other. But it does not have to be like that. There is so much space and magic for us to take in, that we don’t ever and should not ever feel like my homegirl is out to get me. And unfortunately if thats what you are feeling, then GTFO!!!

It is crucial to surround yourself around people that genuinely want you to win. People who celebrate your wins, but also allow you to hold space when you just aren’t feeling up to par. It’s also crucial to set boundaries. So when you are feeling the hate, it’s okay to separate.

“Healthy friendships and relationships also mean learning to respect and trust each other. People respect each other for who they are. People may disagree with each other. But with respect and trust, they can talk about how they feel and work things out.”

https://portal.ct.gov/AdvocatesCorner/Life-Tips/Your-Choices/Healthy-Friendships-and-Relationships

So in honor of International Women’s Day, let’s embrace one another and help each other shine like the stars we are. And remember there’s enough room in the galaxy for us all to shine!!